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Thursday, August 5, 2010

Movie of the Day: Whiteout

The Mike here, and I'm not gonna lie to you. I watched this movie because a) I love when movies are set in snowy places, and 2) Kate Beckinsale is really hot. So that's out of the way.

Though it was advertised as a horror film, Whiteout is your basic "female cop on the trail of a killer" film, which plays like a tamer version of Taking Lives (with Angelina Jolie) or Murder by Numbers (with Sandra Bullock). Those films both had some interesting twists psychologically, even if they were a little muddled, while this one just has the fact that it's set in Antarctica as a twist. It's, surprisingly to me, based off a graphic novel - and I have to imagine there was more to that story than was put into this drab movie.

Director Dominic Sena (making his first big-screen feature since Gone in 60 Seconds and Swordfish were summer hits) doesn't offer a lot if interesting visuals (except for the last few moments of the film, which feel tacked on), and the supporting cast (The Spirit's Gabriel Macht, Armored's Columbus Short, and veteran cool guy Tom Skerrit) seems wasted on the dull script. Ms. Beckinsale is adequate in the lead, and is quite cute, though she seems skinny compared to how she's appeared in more luscious roles. (Kate, you can come over to The Mike's Lair for a cheeseburger anytime.)

There's not much really wrong with the movie, there's just little that's interesting. There's a bit of amputation and the moment when Beckinsale's character has a DVD copy of the giant-spider classic THEM! in her room excited me, but that's about it. I'd say you're safe skipping this one, even if Ms. Beckinsale looks pretty good.

For the Sports Fans - Dude Perfect: Summer Camp Edition

Quote of the Day

Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

-Jay Leno

(That is an excellent point!!!)

Trailer Alert! Who Killed Captain Alex?

Yes, it's Uganda's first action movie. And it has a 4-year-old narrator on crack.

Just watch.


Do you smell what Piranha 3D is cooking?

There are very few movies I am looking forward to this summer. I have been watching movie trailers hoping to get excited for something, but alas, here I am not looking forward to much. Today, I am watching TV not studying like I should be when I saw the trailer for Piranha 3. The tagline for this film jumped out at me: "There is something in the water." Listen, few movies have a tagline that I even remember. Then this happens...MIND BLOWN.

This film stars Elisabeth Shue. Ever since Adventures in Babysitting, I have been massively infatuated with her (sorry H-Bomb). Add her to the mix of a swarm of Piranha's that will liquify people, I am pretty much in love. Adam Scott also stars in the film. This cat has been on fire lately with an amazing performance as Derek in Step Brothers, along with a great role in the show "Party Down." These two together reminds me of an epic combo in our past human history, Adam and Eve. Add in a rockin cameo by Eli Roth as a wet-tshirt emcee, Richard Dreyfuss, Jerry O'Connell, and Ving Rhames, this movie could indeed rule.

Now, if you are ready for Awesomeness, press 1 on your keyboard. If you aren't ready, I would stop reading this post. If you chose the second option, I understand as awesomeness can be scary. The plot of this flick is flippin fantastic. The story takes place over spring break where there will be drunken partying and probably nudity for no reason. A tremor underneath the water of this prehistoric lakes unleashes prehistoric fish that have survived over the years. These fish are pissed, and they are 3D Piranhas. This is the kind of plot that will have people dying in various inner-tubes and boat like devices. All I have to give is a huge thumbs up to this plot. Hopefully, I am not overhyping this flick, but I am expecting big things...and you should too!

Narcosleepy out

Morning Music: Fantasy

Oddly enough, I have that same outfit. Twinsies!

Artist: Aldo Nova
Album: Aldo Nova