An Ode to The Other Guys

I remember, a younger and dumber me, naive to the way of the Ferrell.

Lost was I, lost amongst the nerds without a herald.

I remember, a Caucasian rapper, resounding psalms with good vibrations.

His bunch was funky, thank god for the Boogie Night sensations.

I saw this flick with two cops, a Brit, and a wooden gun…

I smiled, I laughed, oh man I had so much fun.

Keaton blew my brain with TLC references…

Eva Mendez blew my mind with huge bouncing convexes.

Not much plot but for this I don’t really care…

For Will Ferrell merely had to be there.

This flick was fun but don’t expect too much or you will pout…

Just know that Narcosleepy is 10 kinds of Clutch and...

Narcosleepy's Out

In music news......

Swell Season parting ways :(

Glen Hansard will be returning to his band The Frames while Marketa Irglova will make a solo album. Here is what Glen had to say:

"I'll go back to the Frames, and Mar will make her own record at some point. This band (Swell Season) will eventually naturally end. But right now, all of us are just so grateful. Getting together and making music with Mar was a side thing for me, but it felt absolutely right.

"I followed through on it even when it felt like I might've been abandoning my band a bit. But I had to follow through. I knew there was something in this that I had to follow through on."


They made such beautiful music together...sad!

Quote of the Day

I pretended to be somebody I wanted to be until finally I became that person. Or he became me.

Cary Grant

Quote of the Day

“This CGI bullshit is the death knell of cinema. If I'd wanted all that computer game bullshit, I'd have stuck my dick in a Nintendo.”

-Quentin Tarantino

Songs Stuck In My Head - Fake Empire

Morning Music: Bette Davis Eyes

I'm kind of obsessed with this song.  I want to turn it into an intergalactic sci-fi epic.  Like Flash Gordon, but with Kim Carnes as the heroine and a Bette Davis-ish Ming-type evil character.  It'd be awesome.

Artist: Kim Carnes

Album: Mistaken Identity

Celebrity Facial Hair of the Day: Sylvester Stallone in Nighthawks

Earlier today, I was watching First Blood, better known as "the first Rambo movie", and very much enjoyed a deleted scene in which Sylvester Stallone sports a mustache that landed squarely in between the Fu Manchu and Hulk Hogan mustache slots on the mustache continuum.  Alas, that mustache doesn't appear immortalized online, as far as I can tell, but it reminded me of Stallone's greatest hour in his career as a facial hair grower: the shockingly good 1981 action film Nighthawks.  (Seriously, the movie's about Stallone playing Detective Deke DaSilva while teaming up with Billy Dee Williams to take on Rutger Hauer, who plays a terrorist named Wulfgar.  The movie's THAT good.)

Now, let's take a look at that facial hair!  (If you're feeling lucky, clicky makes the little pictures bigger!)

Note that it's difficult to determine whether or not the beard is growing out of his face, or is an extension of his perm-mullet.

Unfortunately, this ruins stealth mode.

Side View.  As you can see, ladies were impressed.

Billy Dee wants to comment, but knows better.

This beard goes well with a beret!

I'm not sure if he's undercover as a business man or as the spawn of Sasquatch and Jack the Ripper...

Wouldn't you feel safe if you saw that beard flying a police helicopter?

Movie of the Day-Captain EO

Narcosleepy and myself were fortunate enough to be able to spend last week in Florida at Walt Disney World. An inclusion to any perfect vacation would be film. While at Epcot, Narco and myself decided to give Captain EO (1986) a try. Following a popular return to Disneyland, EO has only recently returned to Disney World. Directed by Francis Ford Coppola and produced by George Lucas, this is considered the first "4-D" film, as it combined a 3-D film with in house theater effects.

The plot of the film is simple. Captain EO, played by Michael Jackson,and his misfit group of crew members are on a mission to deliver a gift to the wicked alien queen, The Supreme Leader, played by Angelica Huston. When, the crew arrives on the planet,they are captured and sentenced to be tortured. EO tells the queen he can unlock her hidden beauty, brings her the gift of song to unlock, and the queen turns in to the beautiful Huston.

This is a fun 17 minute film that is definitely not something to be taken seriously and is Spaceballs-esque in many ways. In addition to the enjoyable 3-D and 4-D effects, this film also has the inclusion of some great dance moves and some great songs performed by Michael Jackson-"Another Part of Me," and "We Are Here to Change the World." If you have the opportunity to see the film, it is a must!

In video game news....

Yeah, I am actually posting something about video games! Craziness!! This actually looks kind of good though!

Quote of the Day

If you can dream it, you can do it.

-Walt Disney

Favorite Band at the Moment: The National

i've listened to this record (high violet) at least 3 times this week, give it a spin

Things That Bring The Happy, Vol. 1 - John Belushi

If there's one thing I know about this blog (and, considering our young age as a blog, I'm surprised I know one thing), it's that we aim to bring you the things that bring us happiness.  So, I figured it was about time that we start a new feature here on (O)PP, aptly named - "Things That Bring The Happy".  We've got like 50 of those things that bring at least one of us happiness pictured in the banner above, but there are probably wayyyyyy more of them out there that we need to feature here. 

This idea, like so many great ideas, was born in a bad place.  I'm having one of those evenings where I'm immensely annoyed, on my last nerve, and ready to hastily battle the forces that bring me this anger.  And I realize that we've all had those days.  Someone says/does/thinks/implies/reincarnates something that we disagree with.  And we freak out, because we know they're full of crap.  It's that age old "Hey, I know life's not fair, but you don't have to be ridiculous" moment.  And when we're pushed against the wall like so, we have certain things that we go to that take us out of that moment.  That's where the Things That Bring The Happy come in.

In my case, there's one thing that came to mind tonight immediately: John Belushi.  Here's the thing about the late Mr. Belushi - every time I see him on screen, I laugh.  He doesn't even have to say anything, I just start laughing.  If he moves, I laugh.  I can't explain it.

I started up my SNL Best of John Belushi DVD tonight (though I'm still mad the DVD cuts a few scenes I loved from the VHS version - which is in the other room, and I'm too angry to move), and I started laughing as soon as he showed up.  By the fourth sentence ("I am afraid we are out of badgers.  Would you accept a wolverine in its place?"), I was laughing out loud.

From his stints with The Blues Brothers (one of my favorite movies ever, too) to his ranting on Weekend Update to his portrayal of a coke snorting Beethoven (not the dog), I laugh, and laugh and laugh.  I also wonder how he could be so agile, and especially how he can control his right eyebrow so well.  I'm a left eyebrow kind of guy, and wish I could pull that off.

In fact, I kinda wish I could be John Belushi (without the drugs, of course, I enjoy being the me I've created too much for that stuff).  Somehow, he captures everything that I find hilarious.  Even the outdated jokes work for him - his impersonation of a drunken Joe Cocker is literally the funniest thing I've ever seen, and I wasn't even around in the '70s to see Cocker on stage.  Oh, and that brings up the issue of his musical talent, which cannot be forgotten. I so wish I could pull that off.

So here's to John Belushi for being a Thing That Brings The Happy.  You were taken too soon, but I'll continue to run through every DVD you ever appeared on until the end of time.  Whatever it was you had, I needed it tonight.

Quote of the Day - 8/16/10

Monsters in movies are us, always us, one way or the other. They're us with hats on. The zombies in George Romero's movies are us. They're hungry. Monsters are us, the dangerous parts of us. The part that wants to destroy. The part of us with the reptile brain. The part of us that's vicious and cruel.

 John Carpenter

Book Review - Tales of Woe by John Reed

(The following review was originally posted by The Mike at From Midnight, With Love.  It's being reposted here because a) I'm The Mike and I say it's OK; and b) if I'm getting something sent to me to review I'm gonna at least post it on both my blogs.)

When I was contacted about doing FMWL's first book review, I had some reservations.  The book? Tales of Woe, a collection of real stories about real events.  The common theme? Suffering and sadness.  Not necessarily my thing, but I was intrigued.  I'm a horror fan who grew up with true crime stories on TV (so much so that my sister made forensics her beloved profession), and that was enough to convince me that something about this book would be entertaining to me.

From the start, I severely underestimated John Reed's collection of emotionally destructive true stories.  I was sure I could find a way to enjoy what was spelled out within the pages of the book, which appeared to me as a small hardbound edition of black pages covered in white text, with some blood red print sprinkled in for effect.  I've watched enough tales of woe take place on movie and TV screens, surely I could manage about 150 pages of sad tales and 50 pages of illustration, right?  I picked up the book figuring I could power through it over the next 2-3 hours.

I ignored the warnings on the back cover which promised "Crushing Defeats. No Happy Endings.  Abject Misery. Pointless, Endless Grief.".  Another warning stated that there would be "No lessons of temperance or moderation".  I didn't think that possible to a jaded lover of dark cinema like myself.

As I said, I severely underestimated Mr. Reed's collection.  The early stories were easy to get through - a little sad, sure - but nothing that really hit me in the gut too hard.  As I passed the 60-70 page range, I started to get a little tired of the book, but my inner tough guy figured it was just the strain of trying to read the white and read text in my poorly lit apartment.  As I passed the 100 page mark, I realized that I really did need a break.

That old saying that us horror fans love to bring out warns about staring into the abyss, and that's exactly what I felt like I was doing as I read the stories collected here.  There was animal cruelty (both by and against humans), racial injustice, freak accidents, lewd sexual behavior, and more.  Some of the stories seemed too crazy to have actually happened.  Did a baboon really eat a baby's brain and then drop it from a telephone pole?  Could a female luchador really be a serial killer of epic proportions?  I wasn't quite buying into what the book was offering, but it was gazing back at me with an unflinching resolve. 

My pace slowed considerably as I continued to travel through the tragic scenes Reed and his artists painted for me.  By page 140, I gave up.  I was resigned to finish the book the next day.  In fact, I momentarily considered giving up on the book entirely.  Of course, that ended quickly, because there's no way would I slight my readers and the fine folks who offered me the chance to review this book.  But the fact that the book was getting to me enough to make me consider giving up was a scary thought.

I went on to finish the book the next evening.  There were more times when I had to put it down and shake my head in disbelief.  A late tale about a doomed mother and child had me begging the back cover was lying - that maybe there would be just one moment of divine intervention in the book.  I was completely broken down by the tales within this little black book.

The back of the book also made a claim that its purpose was Greek Catharsis, meaning that "You watch people suffer horribly, and then feel better about your own life."  In my case, it made me immediately want to partake in things I enjoy (In the interest of full disclosure, that included watching a video of my 18 month old niece, some music by Meat Loaf, and an ice cream bar).  I enjoyed these things a little more than usual, definitely, and I also found myself thinking a bit about the people in my life who I may unintentionally distance myself from at times.  I'm not sure I was left feeling better about my own life, but I was more grateful.

If that is its goal, then Tales of Woe is a depressing and harrowing success.  I'm glad that I've had the chance to experience these tales - from the silly ones (did we need so much emphasis on the evils of Sarah Palin?) to the destructive ones (I'll never look at the cupboards under my kitchen counter the same way), because they offered me something powerful and thought-provoking.  If you think you can find your way through them, John Reed's Tales of Woe will take you on a journey of suffering.  I must warn you, however.  Tread that road carefully.

(Tales of Woe is available as of August 17th from MTV Press.  Visit the official website for more information. For another take on the book, check out a review by Geof over at Enter The Man Cave!)

Comedy Corner - Steven Wright sings about Rachel

I Like It!!

Morning Music: Little Suzi

Let's all rock through Monday.  Sound good?

Artist: Tesla

Album: Mechanical Resonance

Quote of the Day - 8/15/10

Do not follow where the path may lead. Go, instead, where there is no path and leave a trail.

 Ralph Waldo Emerson

Movie Review: Scott Pilgrim vs. The World

I'm gonna be up front with you all.  Though I risk losing some e-credibility by speaking my mind on a movie that's become a uniting beacon of righteousness for self-proclaimed internet "nerds" everywhere; I have to say that there's something about Scott Pilgrim vs. The World that just didn't work for me.  My mind wants to blame Michael Cera, who's been playing the same Michael Cera since being birthed by Jason Bateman in the early part of the 21st Century.  Maybe it's the fact that I'm from Iowa, or the fact that I'm fat, or the fact that I don't wear faded t-shirts with logos on them, but there's just something about the guy that I can't really relate to at all.

But I don't think Cera's the entire problem I have with the film.  I've very much enjoyed Superbad, Arrested Developement, and Juno, and in each of those cases I felt Cera was essential to the material's success.  Seeing him pushed as a hero here doesn't work for me, but after pondering the film for a day I'm left thinking that he had less to do with that concern than I originally thought.  The more I think about the film, the more I realize the story - as adapted from a comic - comes off as another lazy love story that assumes that "quirky" characters don't need to be deep or interesting as individuals.

 Should I really be looking for something deeper in a Hot Topic-friendly comic adaptation?  Maybe not.  The story centers on apparently unemployed 22-year old Scott Pilgrim (Cera), who's part of a band and is dating a 17 year old Chinese girl (Ellen Wong, who seems to be having a ton of fun in one of the film's better roles).  He doesn't want to be dating her from the start, so when he sees Ramona (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) at a party, he falls in love with her.  Apparently she's literally the girl of his dreams (there's a funny line about some kind of subconscious hallway that's never expanded on), so he begins that stalker love trend we've seen since John Cusack bought a boombox.  Ramona has her defenses set to receive, and thus they begin dating, only to find that Scott has to fight Ramona's 7 Evil Exes before he can date her.

It's a fun story, but people are reacting to these characters as if they're family members or loved ones, and I don't get why.  The side characters are pretty entertaining, but there's little aside from Scott's t-shirt collection and knowledge of music (a must for any prospective romantic stalker) and Ramona's changing hair colors that make their relationship any different from any other characters in teen films.  Director extraordinaire Edgar Wright does a fine job of blurring this dynamic with his skillful recreation of the hip/indie scene and video game love that was expected from the film, but after the film ended and I thought about it for a few hours, the underlying plot seemed like just another film in which infatuation is assumed to be synonymous with love.

From an entertainment standpoint, I wasn't disappointed with Scott Pilgrim as a film.  There's a lot of fun action, cool special effects, and some great moments where side characters steal the show.  Kieran Culkin, Chris Evans, and Brandon Routh all bring laughs; and a cameo by one of my favorite dudes (I won't name names, but I've been saying that he makes every movie better since Deep Blue Sea) was the highlight of the film for me.

Maybe I'm just the jaded dude who's sick of Cera's shtick and lazy "romances".  I laughed at the film, I enjoyed Edgar Wright's direction (though the pacing seemed a bit slow at times), and admire the originality of it all.  But when the whole story is about a guy fighting for the woman he loves and we know next to nothing that makes the guy or the woman interesting, I start to wonder what people see that I don't.

Maybe Scott Pilgrim will become more likeable to me on repeat viewings - it definitely offered enough fun and originality for me to give it another chance - but for now I'm left feeling disconnected from that which is supposedly so incredibly cool.  I guess I really am from Iowa.

(P.S. - Yes, I'm aware there's an Iowan in the movie.  But he graduated from high school with more than 57 people and probably never fed a pig.)

(P.P.S. - One last serious question: Is the music Scott and his band "play" really supposed to be "good"?)